{ Fernando Horta } → Racing Games

Race report: Monza Sprint: One Lap, Total Disqualification

Fernando Horta completed exactly one lap of the Autodromo Nazionale Monza in the Ferrari 550 Maranello, clocking a 2:00.808 before a disqualification ended proceedings, while Juliano Flores finished second with a DNF on his sole lap.

Team Principal Skinner (Scuderia Libra): I do not understand what a lap is, why the car is red, or where my sandwich has gone. Is this Italy? Did we win the pasta?

Sung to the tune of My Way by Frank Sinatra:

And now, the end is near
And so I face the final chicane
One lap, my friend, is clear
We crossed the line and caught a bollard strain
I planned a full race run
Each twist and turn along the Autodromo
And more, much more than this
We got DQ'd.

Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew
When I pushed too hard through the Parabolica too
But through it all, when there was doubt
I locked the brakes and spun right out
I faced the wall and took it all on the chin
And got DQ'd.

What is a race, what has he got?
If not one lap, then he has naught
To say the things he truly feels
As Skinner hides beneath the wheels
The record shows, the car is dead
We got DQ'd.

Disclaimer: This is a fictional, satirical report of a online race. No events described on this text are to be taken seriously, and by no means reflect the author or their views, quotes or situations. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental

Classification

Position		Driver	Team	Car	Laps	Gap	Best Lap
1		FERNANDO HORTA	BMS SCUDERIA ITALIA	FERRARI 550 MARANELLO	1	DQ	2:00.808
2		JULIANO FLORES	WIETH RACING	FERRARI 550 MARANELLO	1	DNF	1:58.925

Related Images

Bms Scuderia Italia, Ferrari 550 Maranello #4002, Driven By Fernando Horta

Wieth Racing, Ferrari 550 Maranello #4022, Driven By Juliano Flores

Autodromo Nazionale Monza